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Day 1
Last night I realised that my 'love affair' was mostly in my head and a symptom of my abandonment in childhood. I spent 20 years and had 3 kids with someone I never really related to and the last 2 years obsessing about someone who was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Looking back in the cold light of the morning, I can see that I have spent my entire adult life in a fantasy place in my mind and I am terrified by my self and furious at the damage I carry. At some point last night a cold bucket of reality hit me. In my family the addicts are out of control and easy to spot - and in my superior madness - I have looked down on them. This is my 'out'. I'm an obsessive love addict and I need help.I can't believe how much time I have given to obsessing about this last person, to the detriment of my life, work and family. I'm frightened of who I am.
katie8uk hi ronnie ..... you
katie8uk hi ronnie ..... you are not alone ive spent 15 long hard years hoping praying wishing obsessin about this man hoping he would turn up just over a year ago and he did and ever since then ive been confused been high on the thoughts and his voice then been depressed and sad and now i think im ready to pray for him to be removed from my life as i cant cope with the ups and the downs ive been single for 7 years as i wanted nothing to get in the way of me and this man getting together ... i feel insane now im seeing the light . i hope you are feeling a bit stronger in your self at least we have awareness of self today thats a start . good luck with your journey.x
Hi Ronnie You are in a
Hi Ronnie You are in a great place although it probably doesn't feel like it. With your realisation comes the possibility of change. I encourage you to find out if there are meetings in your area and get to one and see if you feel a sense of identity with the people there. I too spent many years of my life obsessing and fantasising about men. I also had another addiction and when I look back I can see that I spent my whole life transferring from one addiction to the other. Fortunately some years ago I was led to the 12 step fellowships and now my life is different. My best wishes to you. Venus