Hello.

I just wanted to write a post for gay people. I am gay and I know that it can sometimes feel a bit scary, looking at groups like Slaa. There is so much homophobia around that it takes up a lot of courage to come along to a meeting like this, which is about sexual and emotional issues. I was really scared when my friend brought me a long and I am sure there will be lots of gay people who are simply too scared of being judged to come along to a meeting.

I want to assure gay people about the reality. There are plenty of gay people at Slaa meetings and i have never see any homophobia. On the contrary, i have been able to talk about all ,my issues and relationships in complete openess and honesty, everyone has been 100% welcoming and supportive, gay, straight, bi, whatever.

Like someone else said on here, i expected the meetings to be full of 'perverts' looking for casual sex. If im honest, i almost wanted that to be true to an extent when i first came along - but it isnt true. There are generally more women than men, i have found, and no sexual stuff ever ever goes on. It is just a bunch of hurt people who use sex and love as ways of making themselves feel better about themselves but cause themselves more pain.

For my story, i have spent too mcuh time cruising for sex online and sleeping with too many strangers, to the point when i realised i had lost control of it. Coming to SLAA has been the best thing i have ever done. It has awoken my mind. I have realised i am not who i thought I was. Life is changing so much for me, im working the programme and dealing with my shit, including all the issues i have from growing up gay.

I wish i could make more gay people know about this. I know that so many of my friends have issue with sex and love obsession that is out of control. I hope that people can come to this and pluck up the courage to try a meeting. I have never been to any meetings where there are no gay people - and no one cares either way anyway.

Thanks for your time

Daniel